I’m in a very reflective mood. I have a lot on my plate. (A lot more than I’d wish to share here.) But the point is there’s a lot on my plate.

I’m young. I take pride in my youth, but with that fine feature comes many decisions… or choices. They’re kind of mini stepping-stones, that lead to big stepping-stones, that leads to one of two things: mountains or mole hills. At my unbelievably large stature I already have a pretty HUGE mountain in my way (which is slowly becoming a mole hill). It often hinders me from pursuing the dreams I have had since I was young but I have never let it fully control my life… (I also take pride in that.) Where I’m trying to go with this is that in life, at all ages, we have decisions to make and sometimes we don’t know which ones will lead to challenges or road blocks in the future whether BIG or small. And at this young age, I’m at that point where the decisions I’ll make will impact my future. It will lead to success or failure…or some muddled place where both have occurred and I still come out ok. :~)

So today, in the midst of making a major decision, I tried to ease my mind with jumpy rhythms, and a Trumpet’s screaming mad jumbled music in my ears while reading Kerouac. And strangely enough, I looked over and saw what I’ve been look for… proof that there is hope even when we (mostly I) have no clue what to do, or where to turn.

“Believe.” A simple $5 bookmark from Barnes&Noble casually tossed aside as I tore through the pages of On the Road trying to ease my mind, gave me the answer to my prayers and the hope to go on. And in that moment I had to write.

“Believe.” This slender silver beacon of light elegantly adorned with a purple ribbon gave me hope. “Believe.” “Believe.” “Believe.” The word rang in my mind. “Believe.” As if the Big Man upstairs sent this wonderfully modest token to me in a time when comfort is what I needed most. “Believe.” Shortly following this revelation my mind filled with songs about belief, and faith. “Believe” from The Polar Express. “Believe In Yourself” from the Wiz  “Clap your heels three times if you believe… Believe in yourself, because I believe in you.” – Glinda, The Wiz

“Believe.” One word whittled into a bookmark. “Believe.” Was it really that simple? I began to cry…That’s where you find me now; in midst of tears, racked with emotion, thankful to God for showing me his love in such a simple form.